sexdolls
Shan* Female 26 years old Entrepreneur
The last time I did it was last winter, more than a year ago.
Why did it take so long? Because I haven’t been in a relationship during this period.
The last time I dated wasn’t long either, but to be honest, I chose to date because I had sexual needs.
Of course, the guy was willing, so we had a few pleasant experiences.
But the wonderful thing is that I can feel that the quality and state of sex subtly reflects the state of our relationship at the time.
From tension to sweetness to alienation, it is real, direct and true.
For various reasons, the breakup with the ex was quite sudden, so I may not have completely come out of it all at once.
It’s not a broken heart, but I feel that sex is more complicated and heavier overall, and it is more closely related to emotions.
But sex is indeed different for me.
On the one hand, it is a very real demand and desire.
Needless to say, the physical aspect, although I haven’t had a very peak and unforgettable experience of orgasm and pleasure.
But I can feel that sex can relax me, and we can establish a more intimate connection through sex.
At the same time, I can also feel that sex is also a space that belongs to me, that is separate and can be released.
Every time I change the room I live in, the beginning of the real connection with the room is often through masturbation.
Maybe because I slept with my parents for a long time when I was a child, I feel that I want to have my own complete and independent space.
Whether this space is independent and comfortable enough, the most direct measure is whether I can relax and masturbate and have sex here.
Relaxing and enjoying sex means that I can feel myself, feel the other person, and feel the relaxation and joy of the space.
In the case that I don’t have a boyfriend for the time being, and there is no suitable person to do it for the time being, I will not treat myself unfairly, and I have toys as my good friend, who will come at any time.
It is also a good companion when I am in a sexual mood.
I accidentally discovered the pleasure of squeezing my legs when I was very young, including now.
Sometimes I feel very intense, or I don’t want to be too troublesome, so I will also use the method of squeezing my legs to satisfy myself.
Of course, it is still different from real people. To be honest, the latest sex doll I bought is to get closer to the feelings of real people.
Get a certain degree of satisfaction, but also remain open to new explorations and possibilities in the future.
In addition, I used to be very open and willing to try dating, but when I really had the opportunity to talk about it, I would still subconsciously retreat.
Even when I normally talk to friends, I would subconsciously feel some resistance and rejection.
I think, perhaps I still need some courage and breakthrough.
But perhaps the core is that I have not been able to freely release the softness and charm of the inner woman.
Because of emotional and life, I am suppressing this part of myself invisibly.
At present, there is indeed no very attractive and suitable sexual partner.
When the overall state changes and adjusts, perhaps I can more confidently and freely reveal the parts about sex and soft beauty.
Perhaps I will just continue to explore other aspects that are closer to my true self.
Next, I am willing to remain open and fluid to myself, the right people and opportunities that may appear.
Return to the present, love yourself, and look forward to everything that happens.
